Buddy's Story

This is a follow up to my last story on my Brittany, Buddy. I had to take Bud to the vet this morning and have him euthanized. Not easy and certainly not fun. Last night we almost lost Buddy to his breathing disorder. He had been out walking, laid down at a certain point and just couldn't get his breath as his larynx closed up on him. Anyway after that last experience, I knew we had to let him go. We spent good time together beforehand and had plenty of time to say goodbye.

But here's some of Buddy's story. I got him 10 years ago from a nearby shelter. I had recently lost another dog and my brother was up visiting from New Jersey. He convinced me we should spend part of a day going to few shelters and just taking a look at some dogs. Off we went. We saw and met all types and breeds of dogs. Some were great looking but didn't have the best personality. Then we found Buddy. His shelter name was Dingle. He was beautiful as you can see from his picture. On the top of his head was a little tuft of reddish hair that always grew longer than the rest of his head hair. He was a bit dirty and stinky from his three month kennel stay.

The folks at the shelter gave me the most history they had. Supposedly he had run away from somewhere, was picked up and was a hard sell kind of adoption. They estimated his age at between 5 and 6 which I think was an over estimate. Part of the reason Buddy was a hard sell was because of his behavior. He had been beaten badly by his previous owner. There were deep scars on his head. As a result, he cowered and feared human contact, especially from men. When he came out to meet me, he sat at my feet shaking and peed and peed and peed. In his cage he played with his feces. I left the shelter thinking no, this wouldn't work.

My brother went back to Jersey a few days later and I returned to the shelter, spent some time with Buddy and made the arrangements to adopt him. Since I was over 60 and he was over five, I got a special senior to senior discount and we were on our way. I wanted to make sure he peed before we got in the car. All set, we loaded up. Buddy was put in the front seat and we began our journey home about 45 minutes away. Soon after I got on the highway, Buddy got down on the floor by the front seat, curled up in a ball and shook all the way home. Somehow though I think way down deep, Buddy knew things were different and that everything was going to be ok. He loved rides from that day forward and I'd always laugh thinking of that first scary ride for both of us.

When we got home, I left Buddy in the garage which he promptly used like his cage at the shelter. He relieved himself and played with the results. Buddy still had to meet Samantha, Sam for short. Sam was an older Beagle that had lived with us for awhile. She had her Beagle quirks and would be the alpha dog in her and Buddy's relationship. They met, he liked her and she tolerated him, to a point.

But it was Buddy and me who's relationship grew. I took him everywhere to help to socialize him from his downright fear of people. People would look at him or walk past him and he'd lean against my leg, shaking and looking anxious and sometimes wetting himself and my shoe. Over time he lost his fear of people and was one of the sweetest and friendliest dogs I've ever known.

Buddy would always sleep with me but interestingly when we had guests, if it was ok, he would always sleep in bed with them. It was almost like a welcome gesture and a reaching out for another friend.

So that was our journey together. We lost Sam along the way but had great times, walking, rolling in the grass and Bud doing actual somersaults on his long leash and then running and body slamming me. He was a true Brittany, loved to run in circles all day long. That's Buddy's story, a guy who was beaten up badly but who found a good home in the end. His last truly funny act was the Pound Cake and the berries (see previous post) which he seemed to enjoy immensely. The best thing is, he knew he could get away with it.

Pound Cake, Strawberries & Blueberries

I've been craving a piece of pound cake topped with some strawberries or blueberries. The season is right and we all deserve a little something special every once in awhile. So yesterday I ventured out. I went to my favorite little farm stand knowing that they would at least have some of the ingredients.

Along for the ride came Buddy, my Brittany who's struggling with a serious health issue that I'll explain. Buddy and I had an awful time last week. Buddy has a condition that basically is an intermittent paralysis of the larynx. It happens if he gets overly excited or if there is pressure on his throat. He can't control his breathing if his larynx closes and he loses oxygen and can collapse. When it happens I calm him and try to talk him through the incident. Our Vet is aware and we've gone over all of the alternatives. Buddy is 14 but in pretty good health with the exception of this condition.

I took him to the groomer last week and he had one of these incidents while being bathed. They took him to a close by animal hospital and called me with the news. When I got there Buddy had been sedated and put on oxygen. Tests were run to make sure his lungs were free of liquid and that his heart was ok. We got out of there 3 or 4 hours later and I spent most of last week and the weekend trying to make a decision about putting Buddy down - decided for it, against it and so on. By Monday I had decided we would hold off at least for now and continue to get the most out of life as long as we could minimize these incidents.

That brings us to the trip to the farm stand. I decided Buddy would come along for the ride because he loves being in the car. So there we were looking at all of the fresh fruit, vegetables and baked goods. I spotted a beautiful homemade Pound Cake on the table. I grabbed it along with a quart of strawberries, a pint of blueberries and a nice yellow melon. Everything got bagged up except for the melon which I always choose to have roll around freely in the car.

I had to make a quick stop at the pharmacy so I made sure the bag was wrapped and tucked. Cracked the windows for Buddy, ran in, picked up what I needed and came back out, in what I thought was record time. Too late though for a Brittany with a bottomless stomach. There was Buddy still into his work. The Pound Cake was completely gone, bag and wrapper destroyed in the process. Strawberries and blueberries were out of containers, poked by a nose, half eaten and spread out on the floor and in the back seat. The only survivor was the melon. Buddy had no shame. No cowering or guilty look and no problem breathing. His paws were a mix of red and purple juice as was my back seat upholstery.

I did my best at disciplining Buddy, ordering him to the front seat before realizing that his paws were soaked in red and purple. Too late! Sped home, worried about the berry effect on a Brittany's digestive system and trying to think about the cleanup project ahead of me.

Buddy enjoyed a nice afternoon nap, but as the evening wore on and went into the night, a stomach ache seemed pretty evident. At 3 in the morning we were both up, Buddy looking for water and the nearest exit and me searching for a flashlight. We survived the Pound Cake, all of its butter, the strawberries and blueberries in more ways than one. Buddy is well, looking forward to his next ride in the car that smells like a fruit scented cleaning product.

Secrecy, Accountability & The Press

Our government is moving more and more toward secrecy, a lack of transparency and accountability. If it was only Donald Trump, maybe we could write it off and say "well that's just Trump", but sadly, that's not the case. Of course he is the leader of the party in power and he also clearly would like to operate without accountability as he did in his private businesses. The fact is however that this goes much deeper. This secrecy is really the preferred choice of people in power and it really doesn't matter if they are Republicans or Democrats, private or public entities. Religious organizations, fraternal groups and on and on, seem to have it in their DNA - business behind closed doors, executive sessions, and private settings are the acceptable order of the day.

The most recent and perhaps blatant example is the US Senate (GOP majority this time) crafting and developing a healthcare bill that will impact all Americans. Somehow it has become acceptable that this was done in secret. Mitch McConnell, who is touted by many pundits as a great political mind and tactical politician, finds it acceptable to work on, design and develop our country's healthcare plan behind closed doors with a group of 13 all white, male senators. We of course, have allowed him to think this is acceptable. He and others act insulted if anyone questions the process he established. He says we've been debating the issue for seven years or more. In the end, it turns out that the group of 13 hadn't really seen the draft themselves. Somehow the concept of open debate and consensus building has totally disappeared from the US Senate and that's a shame. The Senate was the one institution people could look to for fair and open debate in government, but ultimately power does corrupt.

While all of this goes on and plays out, the White House has decided that reduced access by the press will help those in power control their message and messaging. So what we've seen happen recently are less briefings, orders not to release audio notes and orders not to bring or use cameras during specific briefings. On top of that one network has been chosen for interviews by the President and his press spokesperson. Controlling the message this tightly is a real threat to our democracy. We also have to remember that these are the same people, leadership of the Senate, the President and his spokespeople, who are so concerned about leaks and stories that they can't control. They don't seem to realize that all of their actions give rise to and cause more leaks, more questioning, and more concern. A state network is far from the answer.

But again this isn't just Donald Trump, Congress, or one political party. This goes on in board rooms all over America. It happens in every little town and community, at village meetings, school board meetings, town and county meetings, etc. At the same time local reporters and press representatives are fairly relentless, trying to get information, quotes and data for their stories. They do this because we can't be at every meeting. They do it because we get bored listening to the facts or the circular conversations, or the personal attacks of elected officials against one another. They do it to inform us, the public and to try to keep the conversation honest.

I'm not sure we appreciate the importance of these reporters, opinion writers and commentators enough. From major networks to our hometown weekly or daily paper or the low powered FM or AM radio station reading the girl scouts news release or breaking a story on fraud or neglect, stories get told every day. Yes there can at times be problems with accuracy or fact finding but honestly most of that can be traced back to a lack of transparency on the part of the source.

All of us have a responsibility to push for and to demand as much transparency as possible. Our democracy really does depend on it. We will all be better off in the end with public discourse and public facts. So keep watch, demand accountability and speak up when the those in power close doors.

So, Where Do We Go From Here?

A pretty open question in this day and age that could probably be asked fairly regularly. But I'm asking it on the evening of June 14, 2017. We woke up this morning to reports of shots being fired at a GOP Congressional baseball team practice in the suburbs of Alexandria, Virginia. As the day went on we heard about the extent of injuries to Congressmen, aides and Capital Police. We heard from the President, the Speaker of the House, the Minority Leader, witnesses, participants, team managers, the police, the FBI, etc. We saw tapes, we listened to the same interviews over and over. Eventually we heard the name of the shooter. Then we saw his picture as more and more information came out about who he was and where he lived. His political beliefs and frustrations became known and were out there for everyone to react to. Then we heard that he didn't survive the attack and law enforcements response.

Many are in shock about all of this, but should we be? I'd suggest that we should have seen this coming and probably many of us did. The political rhetoric, the anger and the disrespect that we see every day was cetainly going to lead to something. Civility disappeared before, during and after the Presidential election this past year and few seemed to care. It became acceptable to attack people based on religious beliefs, ethnicity, wealth, poverty and political affiliation. The disrespect and plain, lousy treatment crossed every political spectrum, left, right, center and more.

As terrible as today's event was, I can't help but believe that Congress and people in government are reacting to this tragedy in a somewhat disengenuous way. There are terrible acts of violence happening in neighborhoods across the country. There are horrific acts of violence that our government participates in on a daily basis in countries around the world. There are acts of violence without weapons that take place by the withholding of food and clean water.

So, where do we go from here? My own belief is that we all have to look in the mirror. We have to think about what part we've played and why we felt it was necessary? We have to figure out how we can all help break down walls, leave our tribes and talk to people who don't agree with us. We have to really spend time talking about how to respect differences. We also have to understand that violence doesn't just come from guns, missiles or fists. Violence comes from words, attitudes and simple body language. There will be more violence and more incidents but we have to try to do what we can about it. Lets try to do this together.

Acceptable Boundaries?

As many of us watch the testimony of James Comey, former Director of the FBI, speak about his interactions with the President of the United States, I'm struck by the boundaries that have been crossed by various parties.

Obviously the President himself has crossed boundaries that shock many. He either doesn't understand or doesn't care about protocol, ethics, legal roles, the independence of law enforcement, separation of branches of government or leadership itself. Many knew this based on his past actions and statements about women, minorities, immigrants and muslims. Traditional boundaries were easily ignored during his campaign. So there really shouldn't be much of a surprise relative to Donald Trump's actions, statements, etc. Trying to influence or stop an investigation and bragging to representatives of another nation that he has stopped an investigation are some of the newer actions. What a low bar has been set for acceptable behavior by a President. Policy by Tweeting is an established method of administrative operation and communication.

Directors of the intelligence agencies are allowed to refuse to answer questions from oversight committees of Congress with no justification of classified information, executive privilege or Fifth Amendment protection. Others would face consequences for sure. Contempt of and for Congress is accepted by Congress and this administration. Staff working for Donald Trump seem to believe they have to walk on eggshells and leave any ethical standards at the door every morning.

But what about the rest of us? What about the President's political party - the GOP? Most leaders and elected officials in the Republican Party sit in silence or worse, defend or excuse the actions that play out in front of them. Some are ashamed but most are afraid of Trump and his base and a few others shamefully believe in the President's iconoclastic actions. Ads are put together to attack people who try to act with some level of integrity.

Democrats are no better. Most have forgotten how to reach across an aisle or a table to work with colleagues. Much of their outrage is false. They have helped create an environment of confrontation and non cooperation. Their poor leadership on a national party level is insulting to the electorate. Their treatment of dissenting voices leaves them with little respectability.

Of course then there's us - the electorate, the voters, the non-voters, the sheep. We excuse the election of an inexperienced government chief executive due to frustration and anger. We celebrate democracy in other countries and don't practice it at home. Many don't vote. Some of those who do, allow themselves to be manipulated by others. We accept incompetence. We accept non accountability.

Many are exhausted from this Presidency, this show, this theatre. One melodrama after another takes place. It all unfolds slowly. Donald Trump is exhausted, the people working for him, Congress and people in general are exhausted. Worse yet the United States has become an embarrasement around the world. Some actions taken or not taken by the Trump administration have made the world a more dangerous place.

Boundaries have been tossed aside, crossed and torn down. We're all responsible and we all need to take responsibility. The emperor has no clothes. He stands naked before us. Shout it and make sure others hear you.