I have a feeling that what I say here is something that lots of people have experienced. It's basically about the ups and downs of battling cancer. I used to be bothered by that terminology - battling cancer, a courageous fight, etc. but I've become much more comfortable with the language since I'm in the fight.
My not cancer life is pretty normal, probably much like yours. Getting up in the morning, doing what needs to be done, planning the day, taking on everyday responsibilities and enjoying most of it. I watch the news, some entertainment in the evening and then hit the sack, starting all over the next day. There are great interactions with people along the way, family, friends, colleagues and just people I meet.
My cancer life is very different. It comes with triggers. They're pretty straight forward. A scheduled doctor's visit, a blood test, a bump, a pain, something different in my body that I can sense or feel. I think it makes sense. I think most people will react the same way but it's a struggle, a fight if you will.
Earlier this week I had a six month check up since my surgery for colon cancer this past June. This takes place every three months and it's part of my cancer life. It starts with a blood test a week or two prior to the appointment. There's always apprehension. Sometimes there's outright fear. It ends with the appointment itself and the doctor letting you know all is well relative to blood work and how you seem to be doing. There's a surge of joy and energy and relief. Thank God!
And that was my expierience this past week - blood test, doctor's appointment and a confirmation that everything's ok for another three months. Unless of course I have one of those odd pains or a new bump to contemplate. It is a fight. It is a battle. So if you know someone with cancer or if you hear those terms and feel they're odd or strange, I hope this helps you understand them a little better.
Now back to my not cancer life.
Thursday, December 11, 2014
Thursday, December 4, 2014
Eric Garner Case - Outrageous
Like many others I am frustrated, feeling angry as well as a bit hopeless about justice and fairness in America. At this point, many lack confidence in the system, responses by government officials and police organizations and their representatives. The Eric Garner incident and his death are clearly recorded with video plus audio. Most people viewing it recognize the problems - the escalation, one officer acting very aggressively, after the choke hold, his knee going to Garners head and neck.
If this factual record can't show probable cause and get an indictment, then body cameras are a complete waste of money. I'm also tired of hearing police defenders accuse anyone who raises a voice for justice implying that all of this is an attack on the police in general. It isn't. It's an attack on bad policing and bad cops. There are cultural issues and biases that exist. There are structural problems with prosecutions and internal reviews. There are problems with violation of policy. Defending these actions is outrageous and sickening. Police officers on the scene could have and I believe, should have intervened.
Black lives do matter. Eric Garner's, Michael Brown's, Tamir Rice's and Trayvon Martin's lives did matter. If we've learned anything, I hope we've all learned to speak up when we see injustice. We need to speak up if we see bad arrests happening. We have to speak up when any person is being treated badly.
I saw a post last night by a black junior in college. She expressed total hopelessness in a world, in her country, that seems to view her as worthless. How sad and how wrong.
If this factual record can't show probable cause and get an indictment, then body cameras are a complete waste of money. I'm also tired of hearing police defenders accuse anyone who raises a voice for justice implying that all of this is an attack on the police in general. It isn't. It's an attack on bad policing and bad cops. There are cultural issues and biases that exist. There are structural problems with prosecutions and internal reviews. There are problems with violation of policy. Defending these actions is outrageous and sickening. Police officers on the scene could have and I believe, should have intervened.
Black lives do matter. Eric Garner's, Michael Brown's, Tamir Rice's and Trayvon Martin's lives did matter. If we've learned anything, I hope we've all learned to speak up when we see injustice. We need to speak up if we see bad arrests happening. We have to speak up when any person is being treated badly.
I saw a post last night by a black junior in college. She expressed total hopelessness in a world, in her country, that seems to view her as worthless. How sad and how wrong.
Wednesday, December 3, 2014
Non Profits Need Ethics & Transparency Too
I've posted before about transparency in government, or sometimes the lack of it. Some of this got me thinking recently about how all of this impacts the non profit world. I've worked and sat on numerous boards of non profit organizations over the years and some are certainly better than others when it comes to transparency or sharing information.
I'm aware of one large non profit that insists on an executive session at just about every meeting, shooing people from their presence to conduct major discussions and big business behind closed doors. If anyone is critical, the answer is always the same. It goes something like, "We're not covered by the Open Meetings Law, or Freedom of Information Laws." There's also usually a variation about the inability to "trust" those in the audience with information. In this particular organization, there is not even an attempt to be transparent to donors, members or other related parties. There are other organizations who try to be transparent but many times they fall back on "executive sessions" at a moments notice if some threat, real or imagined, seems afoot.
Now technically these organizations are right. They usually aren't subject to Open Meetings legislation, at least not yet. Of course probably the best way to change that is to show constituents and then government that you need to be forced to be open and therefore subject to new or existing legislation. I suspect that will happen over time. They are also technically right about FOIL requests. On the other hand most documents, financial reports, etc. that non profits provide to government agencies are accessible through a FOIL request to the particular state agency so why make it so difficult.
Now really good non profits tend to try to model their meetings and their openness on state Open Meetings Laws even though they may not be subject to them. It's easy enough to do. Create rules and practices that most everyone understands and agrees with. Executive sessions can and should be held around personnel issues, real estate transactions, litigation and a few other confidential areas. Conflicts will arise but at least there is and can be an attempt at openness and transparency. In addition, an organization that operates like this will be much better prepared for the day when these practices are mandated by government.
I mentioned trust early on. Many organizations are quick to point out that they can't trust people with information or discussions that go on in their meetings. It's my opinion that this just continues a vicious cycle of mistrust among all of the players. When people hear that people think they can't be trusted, they tend to mistrust the parties even more and so on and so forth. Trust is something that needs to be built over periods of time. When people in power use their power to control and withhold information from other people, especially stakeholders, relationships fail. It's just natural. So openness, supportive relationships and sharing of ideas, although sometimes difficult, can work miracles relative to building partnerships and trust.
The bottom line is that we can't just always point our fingers at government for not being open. The private sector of non profits has big responsibilities in this area too. A great resource for good governance practices can be found at the Independent Sector's Website. Non profits and their board members would be well served by reviewing these materials and discussing open business practices.
I'm aware of one large non profit that insists on an executive session at just about every meeting, shooing people from their presence to conduct major discussions and big business behind closed doors. If anyone is critical, the answer is always the same. It goes something like, "We're not covered by the Open Meetings Law, or Freedom of Information Laws." There's also usually a variation about the inability to "trust" those in the audience with information. In this particular organization, there is not even an attempt to be transparent to donors, members or other related parties. There are other organizations who try to be transparent but many times they fall back on "executive sessions" at a moments notice if some threat, real or imagined, seems afoot.
Now technically these organizations are right. They usually aren't subject to Open Meetings legislation, at least not yet. Of course probably the best way to change that is to show constituents and then government that you need to be forced to be open and therefore subject to new or existing legislation. I suspect that will happen over time. They are also technically right about FOIL requests. On the other hand most documents, financial reports, etc. that non profits provide to government agencies are accessible through a FOIL request to the particular state agency so why make it so difficult.
Now really good non profits tend to try to model their meetings and their openness on state Open Meetings Laws even though they may not be subject to them. It's easy enough to do. Create rules and practices that most everyone understands and agrees with. Executive sessions can and should be held around personnel issues, real estate transactions, litigation and a few other confidential areas. Conflicts will arise but at least there is and can be an attempt at openness and transparency. In addition, an organization that operates like this will be much better prepared for the day when these practices are mandated by government.
I mentioned trust early on. Many organizations are quick to point out that they can't trust people with information or discussions that go on in their meetings. It's my opinion that this just continues a vicious cycle of mistrust among all of the players. When people hear that people think they can't be trusted, they tend to mistrust the parties even more and so on and so forth. Trust is something that needs to be built over periods of time. When people in power use their power to control and withhold information from other people, especially stakeholders, relationships fail. It's just natural. So openness, supportive relationships and sharing of ideas, although sometimes difficult, can work miracles relative to building partnerships and trust.
The bottom line is that we can't just always point our fingers at government for not being open. The private sector of non profits has big responsibilities in this area too. A great resource for good governance practices can be found at the Independent Sector's Website. Non profits and their board members would be well served by reviewing these materials and discussing open business practices.
Saturday, November 29, 2014
The Burden of Skin Color & Bias
I've often thought about the lottery of life and how it affects billions of people, in the past, now and in the future. Poverty, economic status, war, peace, starvation, health, illness, life and death. Trying to figure it out is pretty useless, but understanding that it is out there is a critical part of knowing how and why people sometimes act the way they do, or in knowing how to respond as well.
I wish I could say it were different, but the fact is, most white people just don't get the issues revolving around Ferguson, Missouri. Mainly because we just don't understand or experience the kind of injustice that black communities live with every day. The killing and imprisonment of young black men is a statistical fact. Eventually information and statistics like this have a devastating effect on people of color. As justice is pursued when these things occur, black communities see responses from a system that have to make them believe everything is rigged.
If anything, Ferguson should help some of us try to unravel the problems of the burden of skin color and bias in America. To be sure, I'm writing this as a white man who came up through experiences in the civil rights movement of the 60's and the Vietnam era anti-war movement.
Sadly, Ferguson and the death of Michael Brown have similarities to that time period. The similarities are in the burden and the bias. But there are many differences. Fifty years later, some people were niave enough to think that change had been accomplished. Some things have changed, but the reality of being young and black remains. The reality of being black in and of itself remains.
The language that we've heard in the past week is the language of bias and it helps in understanding how deep it is settled within the white culture of America. We've heard words like "it", "bulking up", "Hulk Hogan", "demon" when referencing Michael Brown. The images of wild, young, black men menacing the white culture as we know it, are there. There are other words and images of black men & women, code words if you will. They conjure up fears or conquests and power struggles. They are bad and yet many in the white community see nothing wrong with them.
You can hear it in conversations whites are having among themselves. "What are they doing burning up their own neighborhoods, their own businesses?" "Riots never solve anything." And so it goes. No understanding of hopelessness or of the odds that are pitted against someone growing up black in America. No understanding of mistreatment by traditional authority figures or bosses or banks or people in the street. Seemingly no real understanding that the criminal justice system is totally biased relative to blacks in particular but also bad for all of us.
What's happening is much bigger than Ferguson though. What's happening is about economics and low wage workers.Young people and older people believe the system is rigged and unfair. More and more people believe justice is hard to come by. This is about the environment, criminal justice, exploitation, fear and a world that seems more and more broken. We are watching a revolution with young leaders who are rightfully angry and frustrated.
Everyday there are new examples of over zealous policing and bad policy relative to economics and fairness. Watch the video of Tamir Rice, the 12 tear old Cleveland youth, shot by police in a few seconds for wielding a toy weapon. And remember Trayvon Martin. I have faith in new leaders who are trying to let people know how serious these issues are for all of us. We need to listen and act. Help eliminate the burden of skin color and bias in any way you can.
I wish I could say it were different, but the fact is, most white people just don't get the issues revolving around Ferguson, Missouri. Mainly because we just don't understand or experience the kind of injustice that black communities live with every day. The killing and imprisonment of young black men is a statistical fact. Eventually information and statistics like this have a devastating effect on people of color. As justice is pursued when these things occur, black communities see responses from a system that have to make them believe everything is rigged.
If anything, Ferguson should help some of us try to unravel the problems of the burden of skin color and bias in America. To be sure, I'm writing this as a white man who came up through experiences in the civil rights movement of the 60's and the Vietnam era anti-war movement.
Sadly, Ferguson and the death of Michael Brown have similarities to that time period. The similarities are in the burden and the bias. But there are many differences. Fifty years later, some people were niave enough to think that change had been accomplished. Some things have changed, but the reality of being young and black remains. The reality of being black in and of itself remains.
The language that we've heard in the past week is the language of bias and it helps in understanding how deep it is settled within the white culture of America. We've heard words like "it", "bulking up", "Hulk Hogan", "demon" when referencing Michael Brown. The images of wild, young, black men menacing the white culture as we know it, are there. There are other words and images of black men & women, code words if you will. They conjure up fears or conquests and power struggles. They are bad and yet many in the white community see nothing wrong with them.
You can hear it in conversations whites are having among themselves. "What are they doing burning up their own neighborhoods, their own businesses?" "Riots never solve anything." And so it goes. No understanding of hopelessness or of the odds that are pitted against someone growing up black in America. No understanding of mistreatment by traditional authority figures or bosses or banks or people in the street. Seemingly no real understanding that the criminal justice system is totally biased relative to blacks in particular but also bad for all of us.
What's happening is much bigger than Ferguson though. What's happening is about economics and low wage workers.Young people and older people believe the system is rigged and unfair. More and more people believe justice is hard to come by. This is about the environment, criminal justice, exploitation, fear and a world that seems more and more broken. We are watching a revolution with young leaders who are rightfully angry and frustrated.
Everyday there are new examples of over zealous policing and bad policy relative to economics and fairness. Watch the video of Tamir Rice, the 12 tear old Cleveland youth, shot by police in a few seconds for wielding a toy weapon. And remember Trayvon Martin. I have faith in new leaders who are trying to let people know how serious these issues are for all of us. We need to listen and act. Help eliminate the burden of skin color and bias in any way you can.
Monday, November 24, 2014
The Crappy Mom Manisesto
Again, I've decided to reprint below, Sandra Steingraber's latest Letter from the Chemung County Jail, where she's serving a 15 day sentence for blocking the driveway at the Crestwood facility in the Town of Reading north of Watkins Glen, protesting the storage of methane and LP gas in salt caverns around Seneca Lake. The letter was recently published in EcoWatch and has been made available through social media. I think Sandra's writing is helpful relative to environmental issues as well as issues related to families, human relationships and the struggles we all go through. - The Gadfly
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The Crappy Mom Manifesto
11/24/14
Last month extreme fossil fuel extraction and I were both recipients of an accusatory outburst by my 13-year-old.
“I hate fracking!” he said, half yelling, half sobbing. “Fracking turns you into a crappy mom!”
And he is right. Because of my ongoing efforts to halt both fracking and fracking’s metastasizing infrastructure from invading New York State, I have not chaperoned a school trip in three years. I missed Elijah’s opening-night star turn in Romeo and Juliet. I did not attend the high school girls’ cross country state championship, in which his sister competed. In fact, I missed all the races of the whole season, and, as such, am the only parent of a varsity runner who can make that claim. I know that because my 16-year-old periodically reminds me of my exceptionalism on this front.
I seldom help with homework. I sometimes pull all-nighters in order to finish up fracking-related writing projects and am barely functional while scrambling eggs for breakfast. This is also my excuse for why I signed a permission slip for my son to travel to a concert performance as a member of the school chorus, not noticing that the date conflicted with the opening night of the play—the one I wasn’t going to be attending due to a fracking-related lecture—and so brought the wrath and annoyance of the middle school music teacher down upon our heads.
And when my daughter called to say that she needed to stay after school to make up a chemistry test and could I please arrange a ride for her, I was at that exact moment staring at a line of blue and red flashing lights screaming toward me and a group of fellow civil disobedients standing on a blockade line.
“Honey, I’ll do the best I can, but we’ve got arrests going on here.”
It’s hard to dial a cell phone when your hands are cuffed behind your back.
It’s even harder when you’re in jail without a cell phone. Which is where I am now. I’m inmate number 20140190 of cell block 5C in the Chemung County Jail. Happily, I’ll be out in time for Thanksgiving—although through no good planning on my part. As near as I can see, jails are short staffed and don’t like doing releases on holidays. But I don’t know for sure. Explanations are short to come by here. I do know that, because no higher-rung members of the jail administration work on weekends, I won’t be released from keep-lock until Monday even though my TB test was verified as negative on Saturday. Ergo, except for daily showers, I am confined to my cell. I haven’t talked to my kids in two days.
Let’s go back to that half-hearted and basically crappy promise, “I’ll do the best I can,” as delivered to my daughter by her mother, who was overseeing an unlawful action (trespassing) at the time. I’ll do the best I can (along with the equally crappy, I’ll try) basically functions as a pre-excuse for failure to see something through. It was Winston Churchill who said—and I’ll have to paraphrase here as I don’t have access to Google—Don’t do your best. Do what’s required.
It would be easy to say that results-oriented Churchillian determination is the approach I take, as a biologist, when confronting fossil fuel extremism (and its greatest enabler, fracking), while good-intentioned half-measures are what I dole out, as a mother, at home. But that’s not exactly right. Instead, it’s precisely because I have access to the peer-reviewed literature, as a biologist, that I have come to understand climate change as a mass murderer that has my children in its sights. (And fracking is its toxic, thuggish, water-destroying accomplice). I’m informed by the data; I’m animated by a mother’s love.
And here in cell 3, I’m doing what’s required so that my kids have a future. Above all else, my job as their mother is to provide them that.
I am not the only mother whose priorities are thus aligned. I was arrested, side by side, with two other mothers, Mariah Plumlee and Stephanie Redmond, who have three young children apiece. At her own sentencing, Plumlee said, “I’m really sad and angry to be here. I don’t like to break the rules; I usually try to follow them. But I also have principles and children,” said Redmond. “I have children, and the laws of motherhood supersede the laws bought and paid for by large corporations.”
I fully believe that Mariah, Stephanie and I are on the leading edge of an emergent social movement that will only grow in numbers and intensity as the dire urgency of the climate change emergency (and fracking, its obscene, clanging bell) becomes evermore apparent. In the meantime, we mothers who are already fighting on the frontlines—with our whole hearts, all of our spare cash and as much time away from our kids, spouses and jobs as we dare offer—inhabit two parallel worlds. When we rush back from the rally, the press conference, the public hearing, the arraignment, in order to attend the soccer game, the Halloween party, the holiday concert, the parent-teacher conference, we listen to other moms talk about bake sales, home improvement projects, vacation plans and college admission criteria. (Oh, and maybe the crazy weather we’ve been having that threatens to close the roads and cancel the game). Some of us are on wartime footing. Some of us don’t yet know there is a war going on.
There are a number of reinforcing reasons for what I call climate helplessness—we’re mostly beyond climate denial at this point—and they begin with the capitulation, corroboration and appeasement of both the mainstream environmental community and the federal government toward the oil and gas industry. Less Winston Churchill, more Neville Chamberlain. None of the Obama Administration’s proposals—including the Clean Power Plan—hold any hope of mounting a challenge serious enough to solve the problem in the unextendable time frame that remains to us. Meanwhile, those in the scientific community who are valiantly bringing forth data and attempting to describe our emergency situation to the public use terms like “planetary tipping points” and “existential threats.” They could say “loss of pollination systems resulting in widespread hunger, a phenomenon that is already underway” and “threats to the existence of your children and grandchildren,” which might focus the picture more clearly.
Filling the jails with mothers as a kind of collective SOS signal is only one tool among many in building a climate change movement as powerful as women’s suffrage (Susan B. Anthony was arrested for the act of voting in a presidential election on November 18, 1872) or the Civil Rights Movement (Martin Luther King, Jr. had many small children at home during his several sojourns in county jails). But jail time has several important, value-added relevancies. One is that the enforced extended separation from the natural world serves as a potent reminder of everything we depend upon the world to do for us. Five days without clouds, sky, stars, leaves, birdsong, wind, sunlight and fresh food has left me homesick to the point of grief. I now inhabit an ugly, diminished place devoid of life and beauty—and this is exactly the kind of harsh, ravaged world I do not want my children to inhabit.
And the other is that jail teaches you how to stand up and fight inside of desperate circumstances. This morning we said goodbye to Casey (not her real name) who was headed to court to face charges related to drug addiction. Which itself is related to a childhood filled with sexual abuse—the memories of which were retriggered when her own seven-year-old daughter was raped. We all urged, as we wished her well: Keep fighting. You can’t give up on life.
Inside cell 3, I have a dream: an environmental movement full of crappy moms who do what’s required and refuse to give up on life.
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