Influences

Everyone's life is influenced by someone, something or in most cases many things. I've recently given some thought to my own influencers over the years. Here are the one's that I think had the most impact:

Family of course is right up there with all of the other things but my maternal grandmother, an immigrant from Ireland as a youngster, had much influence on me. Her stories, her faith and her life helped form a good part of who I am. Also my older brother. He has always looked out for me and been a protector of sorts. He helped lead the way.

I was also influenced by life events. When I was 5 or 6 as a youngster at the Jersey shore, two of my siblings and I had polio including some paralysis. We all recovered but I think that experience early on gave me some sense of the impact of a disability and how it could affect a person's life.

There was a point in our lives when my mother had a Black woman by the name of Alma who came and helped around the house with laundry and cleaning. I spent hours with Alma learning about her faith and music. She introduced me to the likes of Mahalia Jackson, the great gospel blues singer. Also, just by being herself, Alma helped me begin to understand inclusiveness and diversity.

I spent a fairly short amount of time in a Catholic seminary right after high school. The time though, beginning studies to become a Maryknoll priest, had a major influence on my values and where I would go in life. Maryknoll as an order is known for the involvement of its brothers, sisters and priests in social justice issues throughout the world. Fr. Raphael Davila, a teacher and guide at the seminary in Glen Ellyn, Ill., had a major impact on my understanding of social conscience.

In 1965 I became involved in the demonstrations that followed Bloody Sunday in Selma Al. There were many famous people and leaders involved in that action but I was mostly influenced by the young people of Selma. They weren't famous or fancy but they were fearless and certainly had heart. I stood on a picket line with them singing songs and confronting the local police. I learned about courage and standing up to power from those young people and it would travel along with me for many years.

Dorothy Day and the Catholic Worker molded me and helped me clarify my thoughts about war, peace, poverty, the Works of Mercy. The concept of personal responsibility and standing up for one's beliefs became clear and evident.

Time I spent in federal prison was a great influence, some good, some bad. My incarceration helped me understand incarceration in general and what happens to people when others control their lives for long periods of time. People in institutions of all kinds including the military, facilities for people with disabilities, nursing homes, etc. all see the results of power and control.

People with disabilities themselves and their families have influenced me greatly. Learning about treatment, mistreatment, goals, hopes and dreams that people have for themselves. Learning to listen to voices that are sometimes hard to hear or understand has been critical.

Finally of course my collaborator, friend, partner and spouse has influenced much of who I am.

In the end, it's all connected. All of the influences and all of the values come together and become part of a pathway. I'm very happy with the path I took, the friendships along the way and the changes that were at least attempted.